Category Archives: Family

A good way to die: When is love appropriate?

Posted on February 14, 2013 by dgermann

There is a big difference between working to end life and allowing life and death to take its course without fighting it interminably and pigheadedly. People must be allowed to die their own ways, whether violently and with invasive and … Continue reading →

Posted in Caring, Death and living while dying, Emergency/Crisis Medical, Family, Grieving, Healing and Wholeness | Leave a comment

Do we care well in our farewells?

Posted on February 13, 2013 by dgermann

Do we care well in our farewells? :- Doug.

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Take flowers.

Posted on February 9, 2013 by dgermann

Take Flowers: A friend of mine has a secret for getting good care for her uncle at the nursing home and hospital: she takes flowers and says “Thank you” to the staff who are helping her uncle. She takes cookies … Continue reading →

Posted in Aging, Caring, Emergency/Crisis Medical, Family | Leave a comment

Take names.

Posted on February 8, 2013 by dgermann

Take Names: When you are advocating for your Dad at the nursing home or doctor’s office, get personal. Find out the names of the people who are providing care. Not to know whom to sue or complain about, but to … Continue reading →

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Stay put.

Posted on February 7, 2013 by dgermann

Stay Put: What do you do when the doctor rushes out and you did not have a chance to ask all your questions? Ira Byock, in his latest book, The Best Care Possible: A Physician’s Quest to Transform Care Through … Continue reading →

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On being a burden….

Posted on February 6, 2013 by dgermann

For most families you are being a burden if you deny your family the opportunity to care for you in your greatest crisis-time. :- Doug.

Posted in Aging, Caring, Death and living while dying, Emergency/Crisis Medical, Family, Healing and Wholeness, Long-Term Care and nursing homes | Leave a comment

“Directive” in “Advance Directive” says too much

Posted on January 26, 2013 by dgermann

The term “directive” in the phrase Advance Directives goes too far. First it seems obligatory, when what is going on is in the nature of a request: help me, use your best faculties to figure out what’s best for a … Continue reading →

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Death is not a failure

Posted on January 24, 2013 by dgermann

Death is not a failure. Death can be a coming home, or a relief, or an end of suffering. Death can be a culmination, a whole-making, a healing. Death can be a fulfilling. Death can be welcoming, friendly. Death is … Continue reading →

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Readying for the two way opening

Posted on January 17, 2013 by dgermann

Conversation is not only telling another nor yet only hearing the other it is as well readying for the two way opening :- Doug.

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Life is in the interruptions

Posted on January 16, 2013 by dgermann

Life is in the interruptions. :- Doug.

Posted in Eldering, Family, Healing and Wholeness | Leave a comment

Find happiness

Posted on January 15, 2013 by dgermann

When we live beyond ourselves our little crises, worries and troubles & weave our humanity into others’ lives we find happiness :- Doug.

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When do we ask a child?

Posted on January 14, 2013 by dgermann

When do we ask the child what they want? At the death of a guppy a puppy or Pappy? :- Doug.

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Something good in their hearts

Posted on January 12, 2013 by dgermann

Humans don’t so much convey to people as from them: Family does not know what is best for their loved one; Still, they have —beneath their unbending positions— something good in their hearts We as helpers are called to go … Continue reading →

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Your heart, seasoned

Posted on January 11, 2013 by dgermann

Speak what is upon your heart, seasoned. :- Doug.

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Slow me!

Posted on January 10, 2013 by dgermann

Slow me, slow me! Sometimes I want to quickly move along. Yet the best of life is always here. :- Doug.

Posted in Caring, Conversation, Death and living while dying, Family | Leave a comment

The silent vow

Posted on January 9, 2013 by dgermann

Don’t put off “until the time” sharing what you want when seriously ill: if you can converse at that time, it may happen that no one will want to break the silent vow of “keep life going.” You can exercise … Continue reading →

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Before I go?

Posted on January 8, 2013 by dgermann

What is the most important thing I need to share with my family before I go? :- Doug.

Posted in Conversation, Death and living while dying, Family, Healing and Wholeness | Leave a comment