Category Archives: Death and living while dying

Someone who died well….

Tell us a story of someone who died well…. Tell us what the people around that person did to help make it good. :- Doug.

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The Three Ds:

We help families losing a loved one to the three Ds: Dementia, Death, and Decrepancy. :- Doug.

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The case of Lorraine Bayless

The case of Lorraine Bayless is a perfect example: an 87 year old for whom no CPR was given holds a mirror up for us of the complexity of our end of life. We have a 75% idea about CPR … Continue reading

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A double blind spot

Here is a double blind spot we have in end of life care: we ask each other what our goals are. Double blind because first we assume that we know what end we want to experience; and second we do … Continue reading

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Everyone dies.

Everyone dies. This we cannot cure. So then how are we to treat us? :- Doug.

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What treatment as we die?

Everyone dies. What sort of treatment are we entitled to as we die? Could this become the standard for all treatment of others? :- Doug.

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Three stages of health in our later years

There are three stages of our health in later years: Healthful years with few big issues; Years when bigger things start narrowing our possible issues; Frail times when we are in decline. Lawyers can help folks think generally and without … Continue reading

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What is the role of the lawyer?

What is the role for the lawyer in end of life times? How can we get more active for our clients? :- Doug.

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Birth & death ultimacies

Birth & death —our ultimate times— we can glimpse ultimacy glimpse is all we need to dissolve our other-wiseness :- Doug.

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I work on the spiritual end of life

I work on the spiritual end of life. :- Doug.

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A good way to die: When is love appropriate?

There is a big difference between working to end life and allowing life and death to take its course without fighting it interminably and pigheadedly. People must be allowed to die their own ways, whether violently and with invasive and … Continue reading

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Do we care well in our farewells?

Do we care well in our farewells? :- Doug.

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Dying post-maturely

We have always faced the risk of dying prematurely—from heart attacks, road accidents, falls, animal attacks. But now we may live too long—with too much medical treatment, too much needless suffering from CPR, respirators, being strapped and tied to beds … Continue reading

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News: More hospice, more ICU

Friends– We’re using both hospice and the ICU more at the end of life. Today there is an article in the Journal of the American Medical Association describing a study with these results. There is a more plain English description … Continue reading

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On being a burden….

For most families you are being a burden if you deny your family the opportunity to care for you in your greatest crisis-time. :- Doug.

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“Directive” in “Advance Directive” says too much

The term “directive” in the phrase Advance Directives goes too far. First it seems obligatory, when what is going on is in the nature of a request: help me, use your best faculties to figure out what’s best for a … Continue reading

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Death is not a failure

Death is not a failure. Death can be a coming home, or a relief, or an end of suffering. Death can be a culmination, a whole-making, a healing. Death can be a fulfilling. Death can be welcoming, friendly. Death is … Continue reading

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